Category Archives: Humor
Another chance for Ricky Gervais
Thank goodness for third chances.
I was happy to read yesterday that Ricky Gervais will be hosting next year’s Golden Globe Awards, despite the mixed reviews (okay, I’m probably being a little too kind) that he received for his last stab at hosting the Golden Globes earlier this year (in which I do believe most of Hollywood wanted to stab him.)
I happen to like his devil-may-care attitude, in the face of frosty A-listers. I’m drawn to the awkwardness. The audible outrage from the audience and yes, even the boos.
He’s a funny guy and “The Office” is living proof of that (both the U.K. and U.S. versions). Let’s hope that he knocks it out of the park next time. I’ll be watching.
Guide to understanding the British
If you know a Brit, this handy dandy Anglo translation guide might come in handy (and uh, be dandy). Not sure where this originated, but I love it.
Siri & the British accent
We got an iPhone 4S on Friday and was formally introduced to Siri, Apple’s latest voice-operated genie of sorts.
According to the Apple website, “Ask Siri to do things just by talking the way you talk. Siri understands what you say, knows what you mean, and even talks back.”
What they neglected to add was the “unless you’re British” addendum. Or so we initially thought.
In a conversation with friends Friday night, the subject of Pam Dawber came up (remember Pam Dawber from Mork & Mindy fame?) We were trying to remember the name of the old Pam Dawber TV show where she played the older sister? Anyone? Anyone?
Well, out came Siri to the rescue.
“Siri, who is Pam Dawber?” my husband asked her.
“Looking up Pam Dobah,” she finally responded.
“Pam Daaaaahburrrrr,” he had to repeat, with his worst impression of an American accent.
“Pam Dobah not in your contacts,” she said.
And this continued until we finally quit and looked it up via Google without Siri’s assistance.
(If you were wondering, the answer was My Sister Sam.)
We later discovered that there is a British English assistant that you can switch to – a male British butler type (like a posh Mr. Belvedere) with an ear for the differences between Dawber and Dober. He was able to locate Pam Dawber’s rap sheet without any trouble.
Now the only fly in the ointment is that the British Siri can’t look up businesses or locations. That can only be accomplished (for now) by American Siri.
So Brits had best start practicing the right way to say Los Angeles.
American vs. British news theme songs
I’m sorry to say I’m late to the game in discovering the awesomeness that is British comedian/actor/musician Bill Bailey. But thanks to Brian Braiker, I’ve discovered his hilarious look at the differences between American and British news themes.
A wee bit o’ Billy Connolly
Last week I posted about Hunter wellie season and my mother in law responded by emailing me a link to comedian Billy Connolly‘s infamous “If it wisnae fur yer wellies” song.
It reminded me of how funny and so very Scottish he is. If you aren’t familiar with Billy Connolly’s stand-up comedy, here’s just a taste.
Divided by a common language?
My mother in law sent me an amusing article last week that I wanted to share here: “Divided by a Common Language – A Lighthearted Look at Linguistic Differences Across the Atlantic.”
Perhaps my favorite example is the fact that Brits call erasers “rubbers.” I died laughing the first time I heard that one, particularly since British parents are so insistent about packing rubbers in their children’s pencil cases before they head to school.
British rubbers - not to be confused with American rubbers.
It’s almost as funny as the British phrase “Keep your pecker up,” which means of all things, “Cheer up!” A friend of mine’s father worked with a Brit a few years back and still recalls how jaws dropped when he would naively use the phrase in the office.
A special thank you to Sue for sending this my way.
The cute-ification of things
Aww ... look at the little bitty pressie!
Brits like to cute-ify their words. Cute-ify, you ask? Well, you know, make cuter. Cuten them up. I know, I know, “cute” is a distinctly American word. But it’s the only word that seems appropriate for the random act of adding an “i-e” to words – not in the presence of babies or small children but in everyday life amongst grown-ups. Americans don’t do this. If we’re talking about a present, we call it a present. We don’t call it a “pressie.”
Here are some other examples:
Cardigan = Cardi
Lipstick = Lippie
Chocolate = Choccie (pronounced chock-ie)
Biscuit = Biccie (pronounced bick-ie)
Sweets = Sweetie
Postman = Postie
Swimming costume = Cozzie (I just learned this one, thanks to Tori and Marti – hey, even you both cute-ified your names …)
And there are dozens more like this. Can you think of any others?
When your swimsuit is a costume …
I have quite a few favorite British words and expressions. Quite. A. Few. But one of my all-time favorites is “swimming costume.”
Particularly when my husband (or any man) speaks of wearing their swimming costume.
Because although they might be thinking of this:
I’m thinking this:
As a side note to my British readers: In the US, costumes are only used when preceded by the word “Halloween.” Swimming costumes are called swimsuits or bathing suits or The Worst Torture Known to Womankind, depending on who you speak to. But never “costume,” unless you are trying to be funny (in which case, just strut down the beach wearing Borat’s mankini and call it a day).
And so, as this week comes to a close and the glorious weekend begins, throw on your swimsuit (or costume) and enjoy the last weekend of August. Dive in …. I’ll see you back here on Monday!
"Diving Board" by Jena Ardell
BRITRISH.COM 